Saturday, November 04, 2006

Getting to the sunnier side......

Here are a few photos of the cute Halloween visitors we had this week.

A horse and an astronaut....

The week started out on a rather rotten note. I avoided blogging because I knew it could be angry and that's not attractive. Several things have happened this week and I sort of wish the week had never happened. Strangely enough, my week was fine. The problem is that I am the kind of person who is profundly affected by what happens to the important people in my life.

A close friend, C's, daughter (less than 6 months old) has a disability. She will live a full life, but it will be a challenge for her and her family. My friend is struggling with this and has told me that her coping ability is almost zero. I, in turn, have struggled with how to help her. I'm hoping that a visit to hang out, and just talk will give her some escape. She has said that she wants to be able to enjoy her baby who is healthy in every other way.

My friend A's mother has been diagnosed with colon cancer. This breaks my heart, as A lost her good friend, Jen to colon cancer (which had spread) at the age of 28. The cruelty of cancer is so frustrating. Jen was a person I knew only through A. She was a young woman of tremendous faith and strength, who I know A misses very much. Although her mom is Stage 1 (discovered through routine colonoscopy) and will most likely do very well, I know that A is frightened for what she knows Jen went through.

My own mother, has recently struggled with some terrible issues at her office. I also used to work there, and have many friends there. Some of those friends are also my mother's bosses. Recently, things have happened which have devastated my mother and angered me. She has been scapegoated and treated unfairly after more than 18 years of dedicated work. Although I am trying to separate business and friendship, I find it very difficult at this point. I have never seen my mother so devastated and I am shocked at how they have treated her. She still has a job, but her spirit is gone.

My friend J is struggling with parenting her baby. Having lots of experience with children and nannying, I think she thought she would be a perfect parent, or at least it would be easier for her. She is shocked at how difficult it is and how she questions every decision. I see her struggle and wish that I could do more than listen.

My friend, AE, is struggling with being a new mom, and possibly working through some postpartum depression. It is difficult to know quite what to do. I know that she is aware and is getting help. Thank god for her family support and vast network of friends that have helped to keep her going.

I guess this post reflects my feelings of incompetence in helping the people I love and care so much about. I know that it will get better. I know that these people appreciate my support and that their strength will help them persevere through this parts of their lives to come out on the sunnier side.

“A friend is someone who helps you up when you're down, and if they can't, they lay down beside you and listen.”

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